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Jul. 5th, 2009

Really, GMA writers?? REALLY?

What's wrong with GMA-7 writers? Dear management, please fire everyone on your creatives, and hire new ones. Seriously. I can't believe you're paying hacks to come up with the shit they come up with.

Daisy Siete is the only original production you guys have on your line-up. What's up with that? Can't you guys come up with anything original? All you do is stretch out old movies too thin as "remakes", and adapt Asian series as "Philippine version". Good lord, exert some effort, men!

What really ticked me off is this. A few nights ago, you said Zorro will have to face the General's "La Ultima Armas". Guess what that turned out to be. Yeah, a GATLING GUN.




Yes, like the original Django's Gatling Gun.

And YES, like Sukiyaki Western: Django's Gatling Gun:



So, see. I guess you can see where I'm coming from here. Maybe your viewers are OK with it because theyr'e as stupid as you are, but there are some of us who feel insulted by your blatant, crass, vulgar, hack writing. You know why? Because we're REAL writers. And real writers exert effort to IMAGINE original stories. THAT'S WHAT WE DO. We don't just rehash shit, repackaged it under a different language, and call it Not Shit. 

At least, I DON'T. Because not only is that lazy, that's also Not Writing. That's Bullshitting. And if you guys are getting paid to bullshit, then where can I pass my resume? But if you're actually getting paid to do some writing, then goddammit, get to your fucking work, you lazy ass bastards.

Jul. 3rd, 2009

Live!

Watch live video from siegemalvar on Justin.tv

Jul. 2nd, 2009

Writing Tips: On Revisions

Writing tips here. Check it out: http://www.siegemalvar.net/?p=671

Jul. 1st, 2009

Siege Malvar LIVE!!!

check it out: http://www.SiegeMalvar.net/live

Live Lifestreaming!

Jun. 28th, 2009

ATTN: Bloggers Who Fought for the Free Importation of Books in English

Just taking a quick survey here:

HOLLER in the comments section if you've read any locally published books in the past month. (Points if it's Carlos Malvar's groundbreaking, controversial work "Roles".)

And FUCK YOU if you haven't read anything locally published in the past year, you hypocrite. Shame on you, and the people who raised you, and molded your consciousness. Your stench stinks more than a barrel of decomposing crustaceans.

Yeah, thought so.

Si Donna Roa Daw Mismo



More here, o!

Jun. 22nd, 2009

Please come...





Partners-in-Rhyme The Siege Malvar and GP Abrajano are on crowd-control, Performance Poetry High Priestess Kooky Tuason's officiating, featuring new works from Dax Cutab, Raul Roco Jr., Diego De la Paz, Alan Navarra, and more. Gwen Bautista of [info]deusdetonto will get devirginized on stage.

Come, and show-off. Open Mic, Open Minds.

WORD!

Jun. 6th, 2009

hustlin



Jun. 2nd, 2009

OMG



"Blair Waldorf and Chuck Bass WILL TREMBLE!!!!"
- Mel Beckham's reaction to the Exclusive Preview of "Crash"

[Read More Here]
 


"Dark and enchanting, Malvar perfectly captures the evils of high school life."
-
Bounce Magazine on "Roles"

Jun. 1st, 2009

deep impact soon


May. 24th, 2009

Pearl of Disorient

http://www.siegemalvar.net/?p=623

Check it out: Pearl of Disorient

May. 23rd, 2009

Undead na si Lolo

Ang nobela ni Rizal... Dakila na, NGAYON MAY ZOMBIES PA!!!

Mula sa pambansang bayaning si Jose Rizal, at sa kanyang hinirang na kahaliling si Carlos Malvar...

Isang naiibang kwento ng pagkagahaman, pagkalibog, at mga buhay na patay...

WAG MONG SALINGIN ANG MGA PATAY!!!

Basahin ang Noli Me Tangere in a totally different way!

WAG MONG SALINGIN ANG MGA PATAY!!!

Parang Star Trek, may mga aliens pa...

WAG MONG SALINGIN ANG MGA PATAY!!!

Free downloadable e-book in Filipino...

WAG MONG SALINGIN ANG MGA PATAY!!!


Halaw mula sa Vol I:

Umungol sa hapdi ng mga kalmot at sakit ng mga banat sa kanyang mukha ang kawawang binata. Paano nga bang napapayag siya ng dalaga na magpagapos sa sarili niyang kama, sa loob ng kanyang inuupahang silid sa Fonda de Lala? Dagling nagbalik sa alaala ang pagmulat ng kanyang mga mata mula sa pagkakaidlip kaninang maka-tanghalian. Mga katok na banayad at tila nag-aalinlangan. ‘Sino iyan?’ kanyang tanong, at nang walang sumagot na dumating ay binuksan niya ang pinto’t tumambad sa kanyang harapan ang kababatang sa buong Europa’t Pilipinas ma’y walang kaparis ang kariktan at ganda. Ang malamyos na tinig na nagtanong, ‘Maari mo ba akong patuluyin Ibarra, o nais mo bang halayin ang aking ari sa harap ng madla?’

WAG MONG SALINGIN ANG MGA PATAY!!!

May. 22nd, 2009

Sa Pagpapatuloy....

Here’s the first volume to my controversial new Art Piece called “Wag Mong Salingin ang mga Patay”. You need an Acrobat Reader to view it.

Click here to download it.
The Great Filipino Novel…

…Now With Zombies!


 

May. 21st, 2009

Really?!?!

Really, Katrina?



I mean, really?!???!



NEXT PROJECT. Balitang kay Katrina ibibigay ng GMA-7 ang lead role sa TV remake ng Angela Markado, na unang ginampanan sa pelikula ng premyadong aktres na si Hilda Koronel. Ipinakuwento ng young actress kung ano ang istorya ng Angela Markado dahil wala raw siyang alam kung tungkol saan ito.

Sinabi namin sa kanya na ang Angela Markado ay istorya ng isang rape victim na minarkahan ang katawan ng mga pangalan ng mga nang-rape sa kanya. Pagkatapos ay isa-isang binalikan ni Angela ang mga gumahasa sa kanya para maghiganti.


And now, from PEP.ph:

Katrina Halili fights against sex-video scandal culprits. "Hindi ako uurong. Lalaban po ako sa kanila."


Remind me, why is Bong Revilla wasting our taxpayers money on YOU again?
 
 

May. 18th, 2009

Wag Mong Salingin Ang Mga Patay

From national hero Jose Rizal and his heir apparent Carlos Malvar comes a timeless and timely tale of greed, passions, and zombies.

Wag Mong Salingin Ang Mga Patay


Read Noli Me Tangere like you've never read it before!!!

The Great Filipino Novel...

Now with Zombies!

May. 16th, 2009

The Renga Project

Please drop 2 lines over at http://www.siegemalvar.net/renga, I shall be reading the 'current form' of the Renga Project tonight at Jam 88.3 (9-10pm) on Kooky Tuason's "Bigkas Pilipinas". Thanks!!!

May. 14th, 2009

The Not Quite Unreal Blog

Get behind the scenes as young Filipino author Carlos Malvar talks about his bestselling series of books, "Not Quite Unreal". Visit the Not Quite Unreal Blog today!

Enter the world of the young, the rich, and the screwed-up...

"Roles: A Not Quite Unreal Novel" (book 1) is now available in bookstores EVERYWHERE!

Get your copies now.

For more information, visit the following sites:

http://www.visprint.net

http://www.siegemalvar.net/notquiteunreal

http://www.siegemalvar.net

BTW, thanks to everyone who have read the book already! I really appreciate it. Keep the comments coming.

Much love,
Carlos 'Siege' Malvar

May. 12th, 2009

Roles: A Not Quite Unreal Novel by Carlos Malvar



ROLES, a Not Quite Unreal novel

Paperback, 132 pages. Published 2008 by Visual Print Enterprises.

ISBN: 9719257482

by: Carlos Malvar

Check out the Shelfari page here.
Join Carlos “Siege” Malvar’s Friendster Network.

------------------------------------

I need you to do something for me.

I need you to show your support for local publishers and Filipino authors like myself by going viral with this. Tell your friends, spread the word. My book is out there, it's available in bookstores everywhere. Don't just read it, BLOG ABOUT IT.

Thanks
 



May. 11th, 2009

Katrina Halili and Hayden Kho Scandal Video is Now Out

::click here to watch the video::

Now we all know why Dra. Vicky Belo left Dr. Hayden Kho.

It's because Dr. Hayden Kho is more preoccupied with his own gyrating, naked reflection than with sex.

Is it just me or are these two giving off a Couple of Teenage BFFs in their Panties and Singing Along to Fall Out Boy Vibes? I see Serena and Blair making out before these two do.

May. 6th, 2009

Honestly, guys....

Instead of spreading the news about that embargo, why don't you tell your friends to pick up locally published titles instead? 

Do you know how brilliant our local literary scene is?

Do this as a favor for me, please. Tell your friends that Carlos Malvar, a Filipino writer, has a book out called "Roles: A Not Quite Unreal Novel", and it's helluva lot better than Stephanie Meyer's Twilight. It will do this little country good to read more homegrown talents, and less Paolo Coelho, you know what I'm saying?

Fuck it. I'm Carlos Malvar, I'm brilliant, and my imagination is unparalleled, and this is apparent IF YOU WILL ONLY GIVE ME THE CHANCE.

So go to the nearest fucking bookstore, ask for Carlos Malvar, and grab a copy of my book. All right?

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